Updated: Mar 26
I recently met with my clients & their caterer for an upcoming wedding. When the bride was asked if she's ready, she replied, "I don't know how you (meaning me, Billie @ Best Day Ever) does this over and over."
I always ask my couples why they chose to use a wedding planner. Do you know what the number 1 reason is? Overwhelm... it's always the fear of overwhelm. Overwhelm is defined in the Oxford Dictionary as "to bury or drown beneath a huge mass". WOW! To literally DROWN beneath a HUGE MASS. That is why people are coming to me. To avoid the feeling of actually drowning. That's intense, people!
While I'm happy to help carry the load of your wedding plans, I'll gladly offer you a few tips on how I avoid much overwhelm because, let's be honest, a bit creeps in from time-to-time.
Tip 1 -
Stay on task. When you're one of my clients, in your Wedding Planning Guidebook, you'll receive a copy of a tried and true wedding planning checklist. It's broken down by months/weeks ahead of your wedding date. While many want to rush and check off as many items as possible as early as possible, I urge you to maintain your pace. Stay within the timeframe you are actually in. "Why not get ahead?", you ask. Because if you chose to jump ahead and finish everything ahead of schedule, in the weeks leading up to your wedding, you will feel like you should be doing SOMETHING and create your own tasks (and therefore overwhelm) that are really irrelevant. You'll notice in the last couple weeks of the checklist, the tasks are easier and lighter - that's because you're supposed to be relaxed leading up to your wedding. Not running around like a chicken without a head!
Tip 2 -
Make time for self-care. Take a long bath, go to the gym, sit in the sauna, plan a quick getaway before the big day, sit on the beach and watch the seagulls fly. When you plan with me, I encourage you to pick a day/evening each week to focus on planning your wedding. Don't let it consume who YOU are for 14 months.
Tip 3 -
Go on a date with your fiance without talking about the wedding. It's a challenge, but try it! It will be good for both of you to take a beat and remember why you are marrying that person. Invest in who THEY are. Your marriage will thank you for it!
Tip 4 -
Be honest with your planner. When she asks how everything is going, tell the truth. It doesn't have to be "great" and rosy all the time. She's likely seen or heard it all. Tell her. She may be able to talk you through what you see as an impasse because she's seen it before.
Tip 5 -
And I'm not a paid sponser for this stuff, but I probably should be.... Look in to Olly Stress Relief gummy supplements. I'm not a doctor or pharmacist so check this out with yours so that I don't get in trouble, but I'm telling you, this stuff is life. On days when I'm not feeling balanced, I reach for my gummies and they get me closer to center than I was. I've not been diagnosed with anxiety, I know some of you have. I'm not pretending it cures all bad things; it probably doesn't. But, I can tell you that it works for me when I'm managing not just one but a dozen events at a time. Others that I've suggested it to rave about it as well. The folks over at Olly know what they are doing. (Discuss with your Dr!)
Know that you don't HAVE to be overwhelmed. A lot of people go in to situations with pre-conceived notions of what it's supposed to be like. Planning a wedding can be one of the greatest times of you life if you follow these steps and get yourself a wedding planner who's most interested in making your journey to the altar easy peasy. I know one if you need a good recommendation.